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Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

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Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

PostAuthor: mark75 » Fri Feb 17, 2012 7:41 pm

I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don't know what to feed it.
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I had amnesia once – or twice...
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I went to San Francisco . I found someone's heart. Now what?
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Protons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic.
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All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
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If the world were a logical place, men would be the ones who ride horses sidesaddle.
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What is a "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free?
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They told me I was gullible and I believed them.
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Teach a child to be polite and courteous in the home and, when he grows up, he'll never be able to merge his car onto the freeway.
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Experience is the thing you have left when everything else is gone.
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One nice thing about egotists: they don't talk about other people.
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My weight is perfect for my height – which varies.
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I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
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How can there be self-help "groups"?
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If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?
********************

Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground, and I'll show you a man who can't get his pants off.
********************

Is it me – or do buffalo wings taste like chicken?
********************
The views, opinions, and experiences expressed in this post are mine and may not necessarily represent views and opinions of other VTF members, so feel free to agree, disagree, or ignore them.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Over the Mountains of the Moon,
Down the Valley of the Shadow,
Ride, boldly ride" ... E.A. Poe

'13 - FXDC Super Glide Custom
'82 - XV750

Time flies whether you're having fun __ :bike: ... or not ... :fan: ---
and --- Any day above ground is a good day.
so Laissez les bon temps roulez ... just roll safely

"I hear and I forget, I see and I remember, I do and I understand." ... Confucius*

If you don't read the news you are not informed.
If you read the news you are misinformed. ... Mark Twain
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Re: Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

PostAuthor: repeatvirago » Sat Feb 18, 2012 1:48 pm

Nice......food for thought.
If "YOU" like it than that's all that matters..... who give's a crap what others think !!!!!!!
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Re: Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

PostAuthor: dogeared dave » Sat Jan 13, 2018 1:04 pm

ADDLED THOUGHTS OF WONDERING MEN

3 Old guys walking along a beach, 1st guy 'It's getting windy'
2nd guy 'No it's not. it's Thursday'
3rd guy 'Me too lets get a beer' !

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Re: Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

PostAuthor: chrismalm » Sat Jan 13, 2018 1:42 pm

Reminds me of the oldie :
"I just got a new hearing aid, top of the line."
"What kind is it ?"
"2:30"
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Re: Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

PostAuthor: drainplug » Sat Jan 13, 2018 6:31 pm

I'm not over weight, I'm gravity enhanced.

I wasn't born stupid, I went to public school
The wise gardener shakes the tree
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Re: Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

PostAuthor: mark75 » Sat Jan 13, 2018 9:31 pm

A guest calls the waiter and complains, “How come there are no chairs at our table?!”
-
The waiter shrugs, “I’m sorry but you only booked one table…”
The views, opinions, and experiences expressed in this post are mine and may not necessarily represent views and opinions of other VTF members, so feel free to agree, disagree, or ignore them.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Over the Mountains of the Moon,
Down the Valley of the Shadow,
Ride, boldly ride" ... E.A. Poe

'13 - FXDC Super Glide Custom
'82 - XV750

Time flies whether you're having fun __ :bike: ... or not ... :fan: ---
and --- Any day above ground is a good day.
so Laissez les bon temps roulez ... just roll safely

"I hear and I forget, I see and I remember, I do and I understand." ... Confucius*

If you don't read the news you are not informed.
If you read the news you are misinformed. ... Mark Twain
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Re: Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

PostAuthor: drainplug » Thu Jan 18, 2018 12:32 am

Problem with life insurance is you never live long enough to collect.
The wise gardener shakes the tree
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Re: Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

PostAuthor: JamesRS2007 » Thu Jan 18, 2018 5:00 pm

Hmmmm....

I thought I was wrong once, but I was incorrect
******
You can do it right, or you can do it over... :;:
******
There is no such thing as idiot proof, idiots are to creative...
******
Never underestimate the stupidity of others....
******
People keep telling me that I am short, but my feet reach the ground!
******
Those that can, do.... Those that can't, Teach. :o:
******
Life is short, eat dessert first. :bg:
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Re: Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

PostAuthor: Jake » Thu Jan 18, 2018 6:34 pm

JamesRS2007 wrote:Hmmmm....

I thought I was wrong once, but I was incorrect



That used to be in my signature, except worded a bit differently:

“I thought I was wrong once but I was mistaken.” :swear:
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It’s what you know for sure that just ain’t so.”

~Mark Twain
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Re: Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

PostAuthor: oberonspacefruit » Fri Jan 19, 2018 7:35 am

Vinyl afficianado's: eating space dust whilst listening to your favourite mp3's can effectively create that all analogue experience....
any day behind bars is better than a day at work......
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Re: Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

PostAuthor: dogeared dave » Sun Mar 04, 2018 9:33 pm

Perfect pitch.
Getting the banjo in the bin without it touching the sides.

Written on the hypochondriac's tomb stone
'I TOLD YOU I WAS SICK'

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Re: Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

PostAuthor: chrismalm » Sun Mar 04, 2018 11:12 pm

I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid, but he says he can stop any time.
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Re: Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

PostAuthor: Flyingdog » Mon Mar 05, 2018 3:56 am

Chopsticks is why you'll never find pudding in China.
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Re: Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

PostAuthor: XV535 » Mon Mar 05, 2018 9:16 am

Existentialism :- I think therefore I am.

Unfortunately those who continually tell us " I don't think................" still seem to be with us

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Re: Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

PostAuthor: XV535 » Mon Mar 05, 2018 9:18 am

chrismalm wrote:I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid, but he says he can stop any time.



There was a French Polisher who committed suicide by drinking polish.
It was a painful death, but what a finish !

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Re: Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

PostAuthor: mark75 » Mon Mar 05, 2018 7:27 pm

My friend has problems with women,
the other day his girlfriend called and told him to come over that no-one was home.
when he got there, no-one was home.
The views, opinions, and experiences expressed in this post are mine and may not necessarily represent views and opinions of other VTF members, so feel free to agree, disagree, or ignore them.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Over the Mountains of the Moon,
Down the Valley of the Shadow,
Ride, boldly ride" ... E.A. Poe

'13 - FXDC Super Glide Custom
'82 - XV750

Time flies whether you're having fun __ :bike: ... or not ... :fan: ---
and --- Any day above ground is a good day.
so Laissez les bon temps roulez ... just roll safely

"I hear and I forget, I see and I remember, I do and I understand." ... Confucius*

If you don't read the news you are not informed.
If you read the news you are misinformed. ... Mark Twain
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Re: Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

PostAuthor: drainplug » Tue Mar 06, 2018 9:50 pm

If you think you're a great leader look back,
if nobodies behind you, you're just out for a walk
The wise gardener shakes the tree
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Re: Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

PostAuthor: dogeared dave » Thu May 24, 2018 6:09 pm

A man who is equipped with just a hammer will only solve a problem as if it were a nail.

A watched dog never dumps.

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Re: Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

PostAuthor: Jake » Thu May 24, 2018 6:39 pm

If plan “A” fails, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet.
_______________________________________________________________________
“It ain’t what you don’t know that gets you in trouble.
It’s what you know for sure that just ain’t so.”

~Mark Twain
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Re: Idle Thoughts of a Wondering Mind

PostAuthor: Jake » Tue May 29, 2018 8:32 am

If we aren’t meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the refrigerator ?
_______________________________________________________________________
“It ain’t what you don’t know that gets you in trouble.
It’s what you know for sure that just ain’t so.”

~Mark Twain
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